Once upon a time I saw two politicians arguing over which of their partys supplied the best weather whilst in power. Slightly darker, and consequently funnier is the finding that Suicide rates tend to rise under Tory rule.

Importantly, most of these new suicides are in Labour strogholds. You can imagine the tactics meetings. “If we make things particularly bad in the mining areas then enough of those damn pinkos will kill themselves that we can take Yorkshire in the next election.”