Daily archives: November 15, 2002

If you can hypnotise chickens, then surely you can hypnotise other animals. I set out to find out which ones. (All searches were done in Google using the Americanised ‘hypnotizing’ and limited to the first four results pages returned)-

Ducks There was nothing about mesmerising waterfowl, but I did get links to Buffy fanfic written by someone called Ducks, the Mighty Ducks and Scrooge McDuck.

Sheep I don’t know why I didn’t think of this one first. If you are going to shave your sheep you first need to hypnotise it, which is done by dancing the Lambada. (One of the most disturbing noises in nature is the sound of a sheep laughing.) In a nasty turn of events, the YuGiOh trading card game has A monstrous sheep with a long tail for hypnotizing enemies.

Goats Nothing on hypnotising goats. This is only right and proper as goats are so much smarter than sheep. A goat will escape from its field to go and have a look around, a sheep will escape so it can stand on the other side of the fence bleating that it wants let back in.

Pigeons A Pigeon Hypnotizing Machine has been suggested as a less expensive and more humane alternative to setting up anti pigeon turrets outside your bedroom window.

Rats Nothing for rats, apart from a suggestion that the Pied Piper was mesmerising them with the sound of his flute.

Lobster Hypnotising a lobster is not, whatever you may think, the most humane way to prepare it for boiling.

Dogs Small Yappy Dogs (Schnausers) can be hypnotised so their teeth can be cleaned without using anaesthetic.

Cats You wouldn’t think cats were susceptible, being such willful little buggers, but Nostradamus hypnotised them into jumping off bridges. They got their own back by breeding radioactive hypnotising kittens.

And, finally, How to hypnotise small lizards.

Click the image for the full picture

Two and a half to three hours a day commuting is really taking it out of me, hence the three days a week Seeds schedule lately. Next week, in fact with the next instalment, I’m wrapping up part one. Part Two starts next January. The break gives me time to get a few buffer instalments done, edit Out of Fashin and A Trifle Uncool and get it out as an e-book and work on a couple of other projects. There’ll also be a redesign of the site, with everything going onto different strands.

Only a little bit of work then.