21/02/03 – London (Reuters) – .A series of discussions held by the Spinneyhead Union Association (SUA) has resulted in a complete list of demands alongside a timetable for implementation. Chief Negotiator, John O., and his fellow union activists, Mr. Frost and Alan, appeared to be in upbeat spirits after a one to one meeting with Tony Blair regarding the contentious issue of site redesign and compensation demands put forth by the SUA. John O. when asked about the tone of the meeting stated “We will be issuing a press packet over the weekend and are confident the management will realise how vital these issues are to the further success of Spinneyhead Inc. My good friend Tony Blair has agreed to intercede and facilitate these negotions. His participation shows what a strike could do the economy and how this neglect by management must be resolved.”
The union has stated in its demands that the timetable to meet union demands was one week and a show of good faith by some immediate web site improvement. In adddition, the union has asked for working conditions to be improved by the installation of one these in the Scottish office.
Attempts to track down the CEO of Spinneyhead Inc., were unsuccessful as he is receiving intensive treatment at an undisclosed location for mental health issues. A person taking calls for the elusive CEO, Ian P, said Spinneyhead would make a position statement as soon as the CEO was back from annual leave. The Spinneyhead Management team has caused controversy before by allowing a certain member of management to wallow in self pity and talk publicly about his still remaining feelings for his girlfriend he dated at some point in the late 1980s