Daily archives: December 15, 2003


Wisdom from the Inbox

Firstly, forwarded by Penny, the secret of inner peace-

I am passing this on to you because it has definitely worked for me.

By following the simple advice I read in an article, I have finally found Inner peace……..

The article read:

” The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you’ve started.”

So I looked around the house to see all the things I started and hadn’t finished…. and before coming to work this morning I have finished off a bottle of Bacardi, a bottle of red wine, a bottle of Jim Beam, my Prozac, some valium, a small box of chocolates and 2 litres of stella, a 1/2 can of cider, a large reefer and some cheese.

You have no idea how f**king good I feel….

You may pass this on to those you feel are in need of Inner Peace

MERRY CHRISTMAS ALL.

And via Stepf-

When I was 14, I hoped that one day I would have a girlfriend.

When I was 16 I got a girlfriend, but there was no passion. So I decided I needed a passionate girl with a zest for life.

In University I dated a passionate girl, but she was too emotional. Everything was an emergency, she was a drama queen, cried all the time And threatened suicide.

So I decided I needed a girl with stability.

When I was 21 I found a very stable girl but she was boring. She was totally predictable and never got excited about anything.

Life became so dull that I decided I needed a girl with some excitement.

When I was 25 I found an exciting girl but I couldn’t keep up with her. She rushed from one thing to another, never settling on anything. She did mad impetuous things and flirted with everyone she met. She made me miserable as often as happy. She was great fun initially and very energetic but directionless.

So I decided to find a girl with some ambition.

When I turned 28, I found a smart ambitious girl with her feet Planted firmly on the ground and married her. She was so ambitious that she Divorced me and took everything I owned.

I am now 35 and am looking for a girl with big tits.


Sawallahwallah

For those of us who remember Julia Sawalha in her pre-Saffron days- Press Gang series one.

Tenuous link time- one other person with a Julia fixation was Richard Herring, who had constructed a shrine to her in the corner of teh studio for one of the Lee & Herring shows. He’s joined in on this blogging thing.

Both of these links via Rich Johnston’s comics gossip column- Lying in the Gutters


Gorgeous

I should be doing coursework, but I’m learning to use Illustrator by mocking up versions of the T-shirts brainstormed/ demanded in the pub on Saturday. My suggestion-

And, for my more….. endowed lady friends, who were offended by “Smaller ones are more juicy” (you know who you are)-

I couldn’t think of a way to do the “No artificial additives” logo. If anyone can remember any others let me know. When I’ve got four or five I’ll do a poll or something to see which ones should be put onto CafePress.