Wherein our critic attempts to review every American #1 pop hit since 1950

Tony Bennett, “Because of You”
(September 8, 1951)

Wherein Tony Bennett polishes his pedestal. To recap: because of you, I am no longer a wretch so vile even cockroaches would not spit on me; because of you, I am filled with an almost Christ-like ecstasy that will defy the heat death of the universe; because of you, the subatomic particles in body do not collapse upon themselves and the space-time continuum is not ruptured with irritating singularities. And so on. Surely there are great pop/rock songs that are almost as emotionally needy (like Lorraine Ellison’s “Stay with Me”), but none of the ones I can think of are quite as sodden with an oppressive sense of obligation or such sticky strings. 2

via Anthony is Right