I’m cycling along, passing a parked car when the traffic lights ahead turn amber. Immediately, the car behind me starts revving its engine. I pass the parked car and pull in. A ford focus accelerates past me and goes through the lights just as they turn red. Somehow I’m not surprised that there’s a ‘Baby On Board’ diamond in the rear window.

Update And then, on the way home….

There’s a cross junction on Yew Tree Road where we have to give way. I come up to the junction behind a van. After it pulls away I draw up to the line and look right. There are some cars approaching, but they’re far enough off to ignore. I look left. There’s a pickup, much closer.

Before I get a chance to judge the pickup’s speed the driver behind me lays on his horn and leans out the window and starts shouting at me to move (he’s going left and I’m blocking his way).

I give him a look and make a sort of “What?” gesture with my hand. He carries on shouting at me.

I look left again. The pickup has pulled onto the pavement and parked. If the shouty moron had kept his hands off the horn and his mouth shut I could have spotted this earlier and already been across the junction and out of his way. But he can’t see this. He thinks it’s my fault that he held me up.

Now I’m pissed off, so I don’t set off just yet. I don’t hold him up for too long, though. Morons in cars are unpredictable enough. Angry morons in cars are even worse. As we go our separate ways he gets the finger and some abuse in return from me.

So. If you’re an angry impatient moron in a silver/ pale blue Renault Clio next time keep your mouth shut and you might get there sooner.