Smaller breeds of cattle are the next big thing, allowing people to keep a few cows if their back garden is big enough. The Times writes about Dexters, miniature “cottagers’ Cows” from Ireland, which are about the size of an Alsation and produce up to 16 pints of milk a day.

In truth the garden is probably too small, even for a mini moo, and the fences to flimsy. But the lawn’s not flat enough to run a mower over it effectively and we have to cut the gras somehow.