For those few of you who can still get Spinneyhead at work- do not click on the links in this post.
You have been warned.
Operatives of the Priory of Semen, including penile profiler Dr. Nadia Saint (Missy Monroe) discover that Leonardo Da Vinci painted the Mona Lisa using his own sperm. Determined to resurrect Da Vinci and overjoyed that the master’s sperm was not all “lost up a man’s ass”, they steal the painting and kill anyone who gets in their way.
This is already so much more believable than that whole Virgin Mary thing.
Having forced myself to read the book, I can’t think of anything better that could be done with it.