Yearly archives: 2012

B Movie Night: Surf Nazis Must Die

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Troma are probably the most famous of the studios producing the 80’s version of B movies- trashy, sometimes inventive and often gory low budget exploitation flicks. The Toxic Avenger is their best known movie, but Surf Nazis Must Die is a close second.

It’s “the future”, and California is a state in chaos after a huge earthquake (but not such chaos that little old ladies and other folk don’t wander blithely around to have their bags snatched). The beaches belong to the gangs, and biggest and baddest of the gangs are the Surf Nazis. As their leader, “Aydolf”, gets pretentions of greatness (as great as surfers with swastikas on their wetsuits can get, anyway), the other gangs try to fight back. However, it’s not until they piss off the wrong little old lady that the Nazis meet their match.

The film flips between looking just as cheap as you’d expect and weird, arty cutting. Of course, the cuts tend to get pretentious around the point that a more expensive action scene would be required. Most of the budget went into a couple of practical effects and the surprisingly good surfing footage. It certainly wasn’t spent on the actors or any extras- the gangs which are supposedly so terrifying have three members each, apart from the Nazis, who are so powerful because they have a roster of eight. They did manage to find a few suitably decrepit buildings for the post apocalypse, though, so sometimes you can suspend disbelief for a little while.

Despite all of the above, I enjoyed Surf Nazis. There’s an ambition there, hamstrung by a budget which wouldn’t cover the coffee on a bigger production.

Plus, I’d really like a van with shark’s teeth (but not the swastikas) painted on it.

Fish Face (get well soon Bradley Wiggins)

This entry was posted in Abdoujaparov Bikes road safety YouTube on by

Lyrics which, no doubt, mean something to Bradley Wiggins today.  Hope he has a quick recovery.

Who’s that wanker in your rear view mirror
Who’s that tosser in the Carter shirt
Who’s that loser in the ford granada
Who’s that bleeder with his face in the dirt

Where’s that copper when you need him badly
Where’s Homer Simpson where is Bart
Where’s your sense of right and justice
Where’s my knowledge of the martial arts

Fish Face you’re a fish face you’re a disgrace
And am sick and tired sick and tired
Fish Face waste of road space off of your face
And am sick and tired sick and tired

I’m that bloke with the broken racer
I’m that bloke with the fractured arm
You’re that bloke with no insurance
And I’m that bloke who’s not keeping calm

I don’t suppose you have ever read the highway code

You know that you shouldn’t be allowed on the road

(Chorus)
(Riff Instro)

I remember when the bicycle was safe and it was fun

The next time I cycle I’m gonna bring a gun!

That’s right Fish Face
Just for you

(Lyrics via Abdoujaparov official site)

Update The Team GB cycling coach, Shane Sutton, was involved in a separate accident this morning. It says in the report that it happened on the A6 in Levenshulme, which isn’t a cycle friendly stretch of road.

Sweet

This entry was posted in flickr US Elections 2012 on by

Sweet, originally uploaded by spinneyhead.

Congratulations to the USA on not electing Mitt Romney. No matter how gracious everyone is saying he was in defeat, you know that, had he won, he would have driven the country into the ground with a combination of Tea Party and corporate inspired policies.

I may even buy some candy to celebrate.

Is it Sounds of Soldiers time yet?

This entry was posted in Mitt Romney Sounds of Soldiers US Elections 2012 on by

I haven’t commented on this year’s US elections as much as the 2008 one. I’m sure I should have been.

Sounds of Soldiers came, in part from pondering “What if the wrong people win?”, and took place in the aftermath of the sort of stupid war Palin might start after McCain keeled over with a heart attack.

Here’s hoping Romney loses, even though I could see a victory for him and the plastic thingy that would be his vice president would make Sounds of Soldiers even more relevant and no doubt boost sales.

Kickstarting Elite

This entry was posted in Elite on by

I played the original Elite on my BBC Model B, though I never made it to the top rank, stalling at Dangerous or Deadly. I also played a couple of the later generation Frontier games, which were good but not as addictive as the original.

So I’ve been waiting a while for an updated version of one of the greatest computer games ever. Now I’m getting a chance to fund it.

David Braben is looking for £1.25million through Kickstarter to fund development of Elite: Dangerous. It’s the first day of the campaign and the total pledged is already nearly 20% of what’s needed. I’ll be surprised if it hasn’t hit its target by the end of the week. I know I’m putting some money in, I just haven’t decided how much yet.

Daily Blog 11/05/2012

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  • B movie – Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

    A B movie is a low-budget commercial motion picture that is not definitively an arthouse or pornographic film. In its original usage, during the Golden Age of Hollywood, the term more precisely identified a film intended for distribution as the less-publicized, bottom half of a double feature. Although the U.S. production of movies intended as second features largely ceased by the end of the 1950s, the term B movie continued to be used in the broader sense it maintains today. In its post–Golden Age usage, there is ambiguity on both sides of the definition: on the one hand, many B movies display a high degree of craft and aesthetic ingenuity; on the other, the primary interest of many inexpensive exploitation films is prurient. In some cases, both may be true.

    tags: movie

Posted from Diigo. The rest of my favorite links are here.

B Movie Night: The Return of the Living Dead 2

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If you put a TV series into your LoveFilm list they’ll be very careful to make sure you get the disks in the correct order.  I believe this extends to chronological delivery of multiple series, not just box sets.  However, this careful management doesn’t apply to films and their sequels, which is how I came to see Return of the Living Dead 2 before the first film.  I doubt anything from the first movie’s been spoilt for me, but it would have been better to get that one first.

This is a very eighties film.  It’s not just the hair and the outfits.  Maybe it was a particular film stock which got used a lot during the decade, or perhaps the way it’s lit, but there is something about the texture of the image on screen that’s reminiscent of other low to mid budget films from the time.  I don’t know enough about the technical aspects of film stock etc. to be able to describe it more accurately.

I’m not giving any major plot points away by telling you that the story starts when containers of a super-secret gas fall off the back of an Army lorry.  One of them is found by a bunch of kids, who crack it open and….. well, you’ve seen the film title.  The dead are nigh on indestructable and display more sentience than the average zombie- they’re sympathetic enough, and many of the living so flat and annoying, that you can’t help but root for them some, if not all, of the time.

The film is played as comedy with gruesome effects, but the humour is too broad and tends toward bad slapstick, which lets it down a lot.  If they could just have resisted the temptation to ham it up- and had the characters do more intelligent stuff than just whining, running around and then whining some more- they could have had something creepy, with genuine scares and laughs.  Such a wasted opportunity.

Sadly, this was an unfunny, un-scary movie not redeemed by some quite good undead makeup and practical effects.  Just in case I haven’t put you off, you can buy Return of the Living Dead part 2 from Amazon

[B Movie Night is going to be an occasional series reviewing trashy, cheap, off-the-wall and downright bizarre movies.  I’m not going to seek out trash to make fun of- though there’s bound to be a fair amount of that- or expecting to unearth forgotten gems, just have some fun and tell you about the silly films I’m watching.]

Daily Blog 11/02/2012

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  • All Grown Up | The DM Reporter

    If you are an adult journalist, as I’m assuming the vast majority of Daily Mail journalists are, and you write about the womanly curves of a 14 year old, then there’s something wrong with you. No ifs, no buts, no nothing. If you pull a picture of a pubescent teenager from the internet and write about how she’s ageing nicely, or growing up fast, or that she has enviable curves then you’re directly contributing to a culture of sexualisation and child abuse. End of. I don’t give a fuck what your editor told you to write. You are not fit for the title journalist and serious consideration should be given to your right to work among children at all.

    tags: DailyMail

  • London Road Fire Station, Manchester – Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

    London Road Fire Station is a former fire station in Manchester, England. It was opened in 1906,[1] on a site bounded by London Road, Whitworth Street, Minshull Street South and Fairfield Street. Designed in the Edwardian Baroque style by Woodhouse, Willoughby and Langham in red brick and terracotta, it cost £142,000 to build. It was given a Grade II* listed building rating by English Heritage in 1974.

    In addition to a fire station, the building housed a police station, an ambulance station, a bank, a Coroner’s Court, and a gas-meter testing station. The fire station operated for 80 years, housing the firemen, their families, and the horse drawn appliances that were replaced by motorised vehicles a few years after its opening. It was visited by royalty in 1942, in recognition of the brigade’s wartime efforts. After the war it became a training centre and in 1952 became the first centre equipped to record emergency calls. However the fire station became expensive to maintain and after council reorganisation decline set in.

    The building was the headquarters of the Manchester Fire Brigade until the brigade was replaced by the Greater Manchester Fire Service in 1974. The fire station closed in 1986, since when it has been largely unused despite several redevelopment proposals. It was placed on English Heritage’s Buildings at Risk Register in 2001 and in 2010 Manchester City Council served a compulsory purchase order on the fire station’s owner, Britannia Hotels.

    tags: manchester

Posted from Diigo. The rest of my favorite links are here.

Petition Manchester’s London Road Fire Station: Standing Up To The Apathy, Neglect & Abuse by Britannia Hotels for 26 years. Enough is Enough.

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Petition Manchester’s London Road Fire Station: Standing Up To The Apathy, Neglect & Abuse by Britannia Hotels for 26 years. Enough is Enough.

The London Road Fire Station is one of Manchester’s great lost buildings, possibly the greatest.  I say lost, but it’s still standing, more or less.  The owners, Britannia Group, have done less than the bare minimum needed to keep it intact and it now looks like it’s in danger of falling down.  Sign the petition to have the previously overturned Compulsory Purchase Order overturned and, hopefully, something done to rescue the building.

(The petition site asks for a donation, you can ignore it and still have your signature included.  I accidentally did this twice.)

Cycle helmets are not the answer

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Nottingham North MP Graham Allen and a delegation of councillors will travel to Westminster on Monday to meet with Parliamentary Under Secretary of State for Transport Stephen Hammond.

They will be calling for changes in the law so that all cyclists must wear helmets and all bikes must be fitted with lights.

The delegation also wants all new bike sales to include helmets, reflective clothing and lights, and to ban BMX bikes on public roads as some do not have brakes or lights fitted and are only suitable for tracks.

via Deaths on Notts roads spark MP’s call for tighter cycling laws | This is Nottingham.

Every so often someone comes up with the idea that they have to protect us cyclists from ourselves.  This protection almost always takes the form of compulsory helmet wearing and banishment to the cycle path.

It’s not the solution.

Firstly, let’s make an important distinction about cycle helmets and “safety”.  Cycle helmets do not make cyclists safer.  Not one bit.  (In fact, there’s one study which suggests that they actually make us less safe because, for some reason, they make drivers think they can give us less room when passing).  However, I almost never go for a ride without my helmet on, because whilst it doesn’t throw up a forcefield to keep bad drivers away it will prevent or reduce damage to my brain box if something unfortunate should happen. I like my brain, it’s one of my favourite parts of my body.

Making us wear helmets all the time, or forcing us to stay within the poorly designed and maintained cycle paths, will do nothing to make us safer.  Better enforcement of existing laws and improved training for drivers would be more effective.  The return of Cycling Proficiency training in schools wouldn’t hurt either, but MPs and other wannabe safety campaigners have got to stop blaming the victims and start accepting that motorists cause most of the problems.

Bye bye Toast Rack?

This entry was posted in Architecture Manchester on by

The ‘Toast Rack’, built in 1960, was designed by Leonard Cecil Howitt – the man behind Manchester’s Crown Court and Blackley Crematorium.

It forms the centrepiece of MMU’s Hollings campus, which specialises in fashion courses as well as food, tourism, hospitality and leisure.

MMU chiefs are keen to commemorate the building’s history and have teamed up with the Manchester Modernist Society to record its story. The Society – an appreciation group for fans of the last century’s overlooked architecture – has moved into the top of the building to work with students on the project.

via Is it the end for Manchester’s iconic Toast Rack building? | Manchester Evening News – menmedia.co.uk.

I’ve never been into teh Toast Rack.  Maybe I need to take a trip there before it’s gone.

Grand Theft Auto V is due early next year

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Today, we’re proud to announce that Grand Theft Auto V is expected to launch worldwide spring 2013 for Xbox 360 and PlayStation 3.

Developed by series creator Rockstar North, Grand Theft Auto V takes place in a re-imagined, present-day Southern California in the largest and most thriving game-world we have ever created set in the sprawling city of Los Santos and for miles beyond – from the tops of the mountains to the depths of the ocean.

Starting next week November 5, 2012, Grand Theft Auto V will become available for pre-order everywhere and fans can expect a host of new information to become available in November.

via Grand Theft Auto V is Coming Spring 2013 | Rockstar Games.

I may even pre-order it.  Then set aside a week or two to lose to the GTA experience.

Daily Blog 10/28/2012

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Posted from Diigo. The rest of my favorite links are here.

Walking in the air: Castlefield’s own High Line Park – Gardening – Property – The Independent 1

This entry was posted in Architecture Castlefield Sounds of Soldiers on by

Anything New York can do, Manchester can do better. Or so say the residents of Castlefield who are campaigning to create their own High Line Park on the top of one of the city’s derelict Victorian railway viaducts.

via Walking in the air: Castlefield’s own High Line Park – Gardening – Property – The Independent.

I’ve long felt that something like this needed doing on the Castlefield viaducts.  It was one of the things that didn’t make it into Sounds of Soldiers.

Daily Blog 10/26/2012

This entry was posted in Links on by

  • Climate Trolls – An Illustrated Bestiary – A Few Things Ill Considered

    As you travel the inter-tubes in search of learned discourse, understanding and information to prepare you for the coming climate cataclysms, you will see many curious creatures, some common, some rare, who are here for the sole purpose of deterring, deceiving and confusing you. Some will pray on your admitted ignorance or uncertainty. Some will pray on your subconscious wish that climate change not be real or if it is, it will be benign. Some will seem to engage sincerely but seek only to lure you so deep into the rabbit hole you will be unable to return. Some will dazzle you with words so long and unfamiliar and thoughts so obscure and eccentric that you’ll feel you must believe. Some will simply badger and harass you until you can take no more. It is a harsh and dangerous world. This is why I wish to provide you a guide to these many and varied beings you will surely come across as you venture ever deeper into their native realm. May it be a light for you in dark places, when all other lights go out.

    tags: climate internet troll

  • Things Rich People Never Understand | Laura McInerney

    People on benefits choose to be unemployed – What, all of them? Most of them? And if so, if people on benefits really enjoy making this choice, why will that change if you take the benefits away? Rich people say: “Then they’d have no choice but to work”. Except, that’s not true. Instead of working I could choose to burgle people’s houses and sell their stuff at Cash Convertors. I could choose to nick razors, meat and coffee from the local shop and sell it in the pub. I could choose to squat, I could choose to forfeit all my bills and spend years avoiding going to court before eventually saying that I will pay everything back at £2 a week and then start the process all over again. I could start a loan sharking business, I could take cash-in-hand jobs, I could sell drugs. Rich people never seem to understand that if you take away benefits you don’t take away all choice, you take away one choice, the most decent choice, and in doing so the choices that open up are almost always far more damaging to society than having people be on benefits.

    tags: politics unemployment benefits

Posted from Diigo. The rest of my favorite links are here.

A farm in the sky- World’s first commercial vertical farm opens in Singapore

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Land-strapped Singapore has opened its first vertical farm — an innovation that will increase the variety of foods it has available and decrease its dependance on foreign imports.

via World’s first commercial vertical farm opens in Singapore.

Vertical farms were one of the ideas I put into Sounds of Soldiers, and there was talk of building one in Manchester, though I don’t know what came of it.

Manborg

This entry was posted in sci-fi Science Fiction silly YouTube on by

From the YouTube description-

Manborg is a creative and hilarious love letter to a VHS sub culture. Perhaps it has limited appeal to only those who know what we mean when we refer to a top loader. Perhaps those weened on a diet of CGI will fail to understand the beauty and static grace of stop animation.

Kostanski didn’t make Manborg for the masses but he has openly expressed his love of this sub-genre of cinema for everyone to see.

He made Manborg for those of us who lived and breathed it in our youths and it was a welcome trip down memory lane and a rocking good time.