Sex Toy

Giving good Motörhead 1

A few years ago, Motörhead gave their name to a bunch of earphones and headphones. Which seems logical enough. I work for a hifi shop, and put several of the ‘phones onto the website.

I doubt I’ll be doing listings for their latest piece of branding. The band has teamed up with online sex toy shop Lovehoney to release a brand of sex toys, each named for one of their songs. There’s no information in the report of which songs and what type of toys- that’ll be announced later this month- so feel free to make your best Ace of Spades puns.

(It should come as no surprise that the links above go to rude places. You have been warned, if you hadn’t already guessed.)

Source: Motörhead Gets Its Own Sex Toy Collection From Lovehoney

Perfectly modern sex toys

Just over a decade ago, I polled the Spinneyhead extended family and we came up with a list of features to build into the perfect sex toy. I never got around to creating said toy (or toys, some of the features were mutually exclusive), but a surprising number of the suggestions have been incorporated into toys which are now available, such as this high-tech selection that Wired has had a look at.

With this ring I thee shag

From sex toy shop Lovehoney- a, hopefully, tongue in cheek celebration of the upcoming royal wedding.

Issued to celebrate the forthcoming wedding of His Royal Highness Prince William of Wales to Catherine Elizabeth Middleton, this limited edition Commemorative Royal Wedding Ring is cast in a deep royal blue silicone and features a delightful raised motif reminiscent of crowns of regency past. Rejoice in a very special union of your own.

True craftsmanship is called for when a special moment is to be celebrated. Designed by professional artists, this expertly crafted regal love ring is a classic collectable to cherish.

Featuring a modern depiction of the Union Flag of the United Kingdom and an iconic image of the royal couple, this elegantly presented ring manages to be pleasurably patriotic as well as stylish.

Seize the opportunity to celebrate the much anticipated royal event of a generation with this exclusive and timeless piece of memorabilia.

This limited edition commemorative love ring can be yours, exclusively at Lovehoney.

Yes, a Wills and Kate monogrammed patriotic vibrating cock ring. Expect these to turn up in episodes of Car Booty in twenty years time and be ready to pity the person who still has a mint in box version.

Lovehoney also sell these very masculine masturbation aids

And these very Japanese ones

links for 2010-09-03

  • Mojowijo is a teledildonic accessory for the Nintendo Wiimote, which is somewhat ironic given the console’s family-friendly reputation. The device, currently in private beta, is very simple: You hook the hardware components to two Wiimotes. Wiggling and thrusting on the first remote are detected and sent via Bluetooth to a nearby PC (you don’t need the actual Wii itself).

    From there, your movements are sent over the internet and reproduced by a vibrator on the other Wiimote, allowing a remote partner to enjoy your stimulations. Amusingly, the product page touts these teledildonics as just one possibility: the others are sharing the game with someone in the same room, or using the device on yourself.

    (tags: sextoy)
  • Their grip on the region is now so tight that Riviera detectives expect an eastern connection to almost every crime.

    “Everything from burglary and money laundering to vice is controlled by the Mob from former Communist countries,” said one police officer, who was involved in the arrest of 69 members of a Georgian syndicate in March.

    Although most of the arrests of members have been in Spain, the gang’s nerve centre, many of the bosses now have luxury villas on France’s Mediterranean coast, and foot soldiers work for them, flying out for set period before returning home with their profits.

    “They’re into everything, from the Russian prostitute rings in resorts like Cannes and St Tropez to gassing tourists in their villa and stealing everything they’ve got,” said the police officer.

    (tags: crime)
  • A Ministry of Defence scientist died following a blast during top secret explosives tests which were inappropriately planned and appeared to be inadequately organised, an inquest jury ruled today.

    Jurors made a number of criticisms of the trial in which Terry Jupp, 46, of Hatfield, Hertfordshire, was involved at a testing station near Shoeburyness, Essex, in August 2002, following an inquest in Southend, Essex.

    They concluded that: planning and risk assessment had not been appropriate; a small scale test could have been carried out in advance; adequate regard was not paid to personal protective equipment; and they said communication and organisation at the trials appeared inadequate.

    (tags: research)
  • This chopped '32 gluebomb body on stock Revell rails is going to need the rear Z'd, and we're going to do the front at the same time. The procedure is basically the same. It's usually a good idea to plan where your Z will start, and this one in front is going to start exactly at the firewall. In a real car, this is really the best place. It's easiest to use this particular technique if you make the Z where the top and bottom of the rails are parallel.
    (tags: model)
  • Machete strikes a bloody blow for B-movie revivalists Friday, when Robert Rodriguez unveils his timely gore fest about an ex-Federale caught up in a nasty anti-immigrant conspiracy.

    The picture, which stars ex-convict actor Danny Trejo in the title role alongside genre queens Jessica Alba and Michelle Rodriguez, expands on a fake trailer initially featured on Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino's 2007 Grindhouse double bill.

    It's the latest homage to exploitation films and B movies, the low-budget cinematic spectacles fueled by sex, violence and vulgarity that attract cult audiences and have proven surprisingly influential over the years.

    To explore the most outrageously fun movies ever made, we went straight to the experts who pick films for genre blowouts like Fantastic Fest and the Another Hole in the Head Film Festival. We also tossed in some picks from grindhouse connoisseur Tarantino and threw in a few favorites of our own.

    (tags: film)
  • A rare German wartime bomber which was discovered on a sandbank 70 years after it was shot down during the Battle of Britain is to be raised, it was announced today.

    The twin-engined Dornier 17 first emerged from Goodwin Sands, a ten-mile long sandbank off the coast of Deal, Kent, two years ago, a spokesman for the RAF Museum said.

    Since then, the museum has worked with Wessex Archaeology to complete a full survey of the wreck site, usually associated with shipwrecks, before the plane is recovered and eventually exhibited as part of the Battle of Britain Beacon project.

    (tags: WW2)
  • A lonely island in the middle of the South Atlantic conceals Charles Darwin's best-kept secret.

    Two hundred years ago, Ascension Island was a barren volcanic edifice.

    Today, its peaks are covered by lush tropical "cloud forest".

    What happened in the interim is the amazing story of how the architect of evolution, Kew Gardens and the Royal Navy conspired to build a fully functioning, but totally artificial ecosystem.

    By a bizarre twist, this great imperial experiment may hold the key to the future colonisation of Mars.

  • Rivals to the iPad have been unveiled as the IFA tech show gets underway in Berlin. Samsung's Galaxy Tab and Toshiba's Folio 100 run on the Android 2.2 operating system.

    It allows the mini computers without keyboards to play flash video – the most popular format in the world. But their sizes also set them apart from the iPad as BBC Technology Correspondent Rory Cellan-Jones found out.

World Cup fever or really bad branding?

The Scoregasm I Love England World Cup Remote Control 10 Speed Love Egg. I’m not sure what the message is meant to be with this particular promotion- “He’s going to be no use to you when England’s playing” or “Look, a way for women to get excited about football!”

I shall be avoiding the World Cup as much as possible, but I doubt I’ll be using a sex toy to do it.

Be Your Own Valentine

New at Etsy, two Be Your Own Valentine cards. The outside is simple enough-

But open it to reveal one of these two images-

They can be read either way- sex positive celebration of being single or “I’m really not that into you, try this.” Order them now to get them in time for Valentine’s Day.

Update A variation on the design is now available on Cafe Press. It’s available individually, in a 10 pack or in a 20 pack.

Further update Someone at CafePress thinks vibrators may be against their Questionable Material & Prohibited Content Guidelines and those cards aren’t available until they make a decision.

Tweets today

22:29 Blog: Tweets today #

22:48 After the success of the Hawaiian pub crawl, Alex now wants to organise a fake breast pub crawl. Nice. #

23:09 Dimbleby is psychic! I asked if he’d fly me to Washington and he immediately said no. #

00:29 Blog: No, Mister Bond, I expect you to buy #

09:31 Blog: The Barack Obama dildo versus the George Bush butt plug #

11:11 £115 on waterproofs. But it’ll be worth it not to get soaked like last Wednesday. Felt crap for days. #

14:18 I like you so much better when you’re naked. #

16:12 Two pages inked. Good going. #

19:13 Zombie murder mysteries. #

19:38 Huffkin. Huffkin, huffkin, huffkin. #

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A bundle of links

I’ve been sent a bunch of links this week that I just haven’t got round to blogging. So I’m going to catch up by putting them all in this post.

From Tim

CHDK. New firmware I could install on my Canon A620 to give t new and interesting features, including bracketing, which I wanted to do loads in the States.

Copycrime. We’re all criminals because we want to play our music on a variety of machines and in different formats.

PeerGuardian. Protect your privacy on p2p.

Project Dalek

We like Daleks, here at Project Dalek. We like them a lot. We want more Daleks in this world. We don’t really care what size they are – scale models or full-size Daleks. We don’t care if they are ‘real’ or CG renders. So long as they are Daleks we are happy.

Are you ready to take the plunge and create a Dalek of your very own? If so, Project Dalek is the place for you. Project Dalek is the home of the ‘Dalek Builder’s Workshop Manual’, the Dalek builder’s bible. It contains everything you need to know about how to construct a full size Dalek of your very own.

We also have Dalek plans for every major Dalek variant. These are free to download, once you have become part of the Project.

From Skippy

Stopped Clocks. A campaign to get public clocks around the country running again.

The Toy. A Bluetooth enabled vibrator.

Here’s how it works: Ladies, get your lover to send you a text message. Sync your Bluetooth-enabled phone with The Toy, then insert The Toy (not your phone, that could be a serious hospital bill) into your you-know-what. Grab your cell phone, and read the text message your lover sent you. The message is then transported automatically to The Toy, which turns those SMS messages into vibrations. Best of all, each letter of the alphabet has a different effect on your body. More specifically, there are 45 possible vibrating effects from any one letter, plus 7,200 variations from a single text message. So depending on the length of the message, you could feel some serious vibration.

Museum of Sex (Do I need to say NSFW?)

Furry head, originally uploaded by spinneyhead.

Skippy and I visited the Museum of Sex whilst in Manhattan. It was only three or four blocks away from our hotel and we found some money off vouchers. (Who am I kidding. Once I’d found it, I had to visit.)

I was surprised by the openness to photography in this and other museums and galleries I visited (but most especially in this one). There also seemed to be lots of dark, unwatched corners in the Sex and the Moving Image display that could become sticky with the wrong visitors.

The third room had an interesting array of displays, including many that could inform the Perfect Sex Toy project. I have the Sex Machines book to use as reference as well. There were also some really cool robot sex dioramas by an artist called Michael Sullivan. Wired has a gallery of his work.

The Museum celebrated its fifth birthday recently (there’s also video of the event at Fleshbot).

Museum of Sex photo set

Jamie Hewlett's Ultimate Members vibrators

Jamie Hewlett, of Tank Girl, Gorillaz and Monkey: Journey to the West fame, has produced a range of cartoon themed vibrators, available through high end sex toy maker Jimmyjane. Each vibrator has a character etched on it, with their own biography in the style of the Antipodean armour lover.

Neat, but at $275 each, a bit expensive for most geeks.

via Fleshbot

We, the undersigned
Petition Tony Blair, and get as many people as possible to back you up.  I doubt he reads even the most popular ones, they’ll all be handled by some flunky, but it feels like being part of the decision making process. Back the scrapping of ID cards.  Closes soon, so make your voice heard.

Less seriously- cut the tax on sex toys, lingerie and cigars.  You have until Sunday to back this one.

Not sure if this one’s serious or not –  "Force the manufacturers of Alco-pops include a high dose fertility control hormone in order to reduce the rate of un-planned teenage pregnancies in the UK"

I’m got an idea for a petition.  Something along the lines of "Introduce a Cycling Proficiency style test for children and adults to make them more confident and competent on the road.  This will be voluntary except for- bus and taxi drivers, officials with responsibilities for transport, those guilty of certain driving offences and motoring journalists.  Include a section on cycle craft into the driving test which will be waived for any learner who has passed Cycling Proficiency in the last five years.  This will make motorists more aware of other road users, improve the safety of cyclists on our roads and hopefully increase the number of people using bikes."

Virtual Hole and Virtual Stick

I’m positive that remore control was one of the important features for the Perfect Sex Toy we specced a couple of years ago.

Two way teledildonics is now possible, thanks Segment Inc., who have introduced the Virtual Hole and Virtual Stick. I’m lost for words when it comes to describing the product, just read the copy on the site and watch the very odd promotional videos.

Not Safe For Work, obviously.

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