vibrator


Be Your Own Valentine

New at Etsy, two Be Your Own Valentine cards. The outside is simple enough-

But open it to reveal one of these two images-

They can be read either way- sex positive celebration of being single or “I’m really not that into you, try this.” Order them now to get them in time for Valentine’s Day.

Update A variation on the design is now available on Cafe Press. It’s available individually, in a 10 pack or in a 20 pack.

Further update Someone at CafePress thinks vibrators may be against their Questionable Material & Prohibited Content Guidelines and those cards aren’t available until they make a decision.


A bundle of links

I’ve been sent a bunch of links this week that I just haven’t got round to blogging. So I’m going to catch up by putting them all in this post.

From Tim

CHDK. New firmware I could install on my Canon A620 to give t new and interesting features, including bracketing, which I wanted to do loads in the States.

Copycrime. We’re all criminals because we want to play our music on a variety of machines and in different formats.

PeerGuardian. Protect your privacy on p2p.

Project Dalek

We like Daleks, here at Project Dalek. We like them a lot. We want more Daleks in this world. We don’t really care what size they are – scale models or full-size Daleks. We don’t care if they are ‘real’ or CG renders. So long as they are Daleks we are happy.

Are you ready to take the plunge and create a Dalek of your very own? If so, Project Dalek is the place for you. Project Dalek is the home of the ‘Dalek Builder’s Workshop Manual’, the Dalek builder’s bible. It contains everything you need to know about how to construct a full size Dalek of your very own.

We also have Dalek plans for every major Dalek variant. These are free to download, once you have become part of the Project.

From Skippy

Stopped Clocks. A campaign to get public clocks around the country running again.

The Toy. A Bluetooth enabled vibrator.

Here’s how it works: Ladies, get your lover to send you a text message. Sync your Bluetooth-enabled phone with The Toy, then insert The Toy (not your phone, that could be a serious hospital bill) into your you-know-what. Grab your cell phone, and read the text message your lover sent you. The message is then transported automatically to The Toy, which turns those SMS messages into vibrations. Best of all, each letter of the alphabet has a different effect on your body. More specifically, there are 45 possible vibrating effects from any one letter, plus 7,200 variations from a single text message. So depending on the length of the message, you could feel some serious vibration.


Jamie Hewlett's Ultimate Members vibrators

Jamie Hewlett, of Tank Girl, Gorillaz and Monkey: Journey to the West fame, has produced a range of cartoon themed vibrators, available through high end sex toy maker Jimmyjane. Each vibrator has a character etched on it, with their own biography in the style of the Antipodean armour lover.

Neat, but at $275 each, a bit expensive for most geeks.

via Fleshbot


Talking Head

The Talking Head vibrator brings audio stimulation as well as physical stimulation for a complete sensation. A technologically advanced rabbit vibrator with onboard computer chip controls, this vibe is the one everyone’s
talking about. Especially as you can record your own voice, your lover’s or download voices from anonymous strangers to fulfill your most lustful ambitions. All in the privacy of your home. Or office. Because we’re
developing new products for that, too.

That wasn’t on the Perfect Sex Toy list either.

via Fleshbot

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iBuzz

I’m sure someone’s already done this, but it’s hip because it’s jumping on the iPod bandwagon. Or something.

The iBuzz plugs into your iPod (or any other music player) and vibrates in time with the music. It also comes with his ‘n hers attachments.

Turn him into a vibrator with the stretchy ring and use the soft sleeve for sensitive stimulation.

via BoingBoing

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MekSex

A little thesis, with illustrations, on the history of mechanical devices used for sexual stimulation (does that sound learned enough?) NSFW, of course.

Many a young girl discovers the pleasure of sex by way of an innocent activity that happens to apply pressure to her crotch. Bouncing on Uncle Bob’s knee, frolicking on playground equipment, climbing trees, and horseback riding are good examples, but no machine in our culture has contributed more to the pleasure of young girls than the bicycle.

Bicycles and exercise bikes are popular props in erotic stories. The ride is often enhanced by a specially constructed, sexually stimulating seat, sometimes nothing more than a dildo. In extreme settings the rider is lashed to the bike and must continue pedaling, and thus receiving sexual stimulation, or be subjected to some sort of motivation such as electric shock. I kind of like the idea of a powerful, variable intensity vibrator built into the seat, connected to a control box in such a way that the slower the rider pedals the stronger the vibration. In the beginning the rider may prefer to go slow, but after a few good orgasms the situation will be most conducive to weight loss.

via Fleshbot

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Scavenger Hunt Sex Toy

One student’s account of building a sex toy that fulfills several of Spinneyhead’s criteria.

I shall now detail how I constructed this item. The first order of business, right after the conga line, was acquiring a vibrator to modify. We went to Condom Kingdom in Melbourne Central at about 4pm. We had already been past there during the conga line, and were too soft to go to a proper, poorly-lit, sex shop. We bought a black battery operated vibrator for about $25. Then for about an hour we played with the vibrator, sneaking up on people, humping their heads and cock slapping them.

When we got tired of that, I dropped by home to see what parts I had lying around that I could make use of. I grabbed a cordless drill motor/gearbox, some aluminium tubing/sheet/rod, nuts and bolts, transistors, resistors, diodes, an old parallel port cable and a protoboard. I also grabbed my notebook computer, an IBM PIII 700, running Slackware Linux 10.1. I determined that the only other parts I would need to buy would be three relays, two 3 amp for two vibrate speeds, and one 5 amp for ‘thrust’.

Via BoingBoing

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As recommended by City Life

Welcome to all the visitors who have come to Spinneyhead as a result of the City Life article on blogging.

I’ve been blogging since January of 2001, though in the early days I had a tendency for very brief posts. There have been a number of changes in emphasis and design over the years. Check out the archives, at the bottom of the left hand column, for a taste. If you check out the individual posts you may even see examples of the last couple of page layouts. For a more detailed look at the evolution of Spinneyhead’s style (or lack of it), you could check the Wayback Machine at the Internet Archive.

Greatest Hits

Some posts get more attention than others, and you can’t always tell which ones will be high performers. The Sex Toy post has been consistently popular and spawned further posts and some clothes. (If you want to claim your free vibrator, click on the button below.)

Naughty Gifts for Naughty People, Click Here!

The next three most popular links all involve videos-

Fred the Dursty Parrot, which samples and mocks the Limp Bizkit front man’s sex tape.

Take My Breath Away, a video for a cover version (found on the site of Didsbury based Hippocamp records) of a soft rock “classic” which involves exploding aeroplanes, freefall cats and GW Bush giving the world the finger.

Queerest of the Queer, another bit of impromptu mockery, this time of a former WWE wrestler turned right wing nutjob.

Around Spinneyhead

There are seven blogs in the Spinneyhead family. You can see the most recent posts from each of them in the column down the right hand side. Briefly, they are-

Spinneyhead- a group blog that is still dedicated to wasting time at work (where there is Internet access andthe filters let it through). This is where all the stuff that doesn’t fall into one of the specialist categories goes.

How to Save the World for Free– I started this because my parents are planning to build a low energy eco-house. The subject matter has expanded to encompass more than just the kind of equipment and designs they’ll need, but that original idea lies at the hear of it.

Spinneyworld– all about the cool stuff that goes on around us. The idea is to recruit a blogger from each time zone to report on events such as festivals that happen in their area.

Digest– dedicated to good food, whether it be food that tastes good or food that is good for you. They’re the same thing more often than you’d think.

Dig– Spinneyhead has an allotment, though work on it has been slow this year. Dig is a lazy person’s guide to growing and harvesting their own food.

Scale– because I’m a geek who never grew out of his modelmaking phase. Mostly about my own projects but occassionally spiced up with interesting news and photo reference links.

Steam Geek– this is my Fred Dibnah blog. It’s all about fascinating old technology, mostly from the Victorian era onwards. This is another blog that is going to provide lots of photo reference material, just for some very strange models.

There are other sections to the site. The Galleries are here. They spawned Discontinuous Infill, an occassional zine-on-a-disc about all sorts of writing on walls.

Cycling On The Pavement is a selection of longer articles and fiction. There are a few chapters from ongoing novel projects in there. I self published a print-on-demand novel a few years ago. There’s an expanded downloadable version here. Treat it as shareware, you can pay as much or as little for it as you want.

Deputised Experts is syndicated by Webcomics Nation. If you have a website and want to put a regular (Mondays and Fridays) crime comic strip on it then you can “tooncast” it. You get extra content, I get more exposure. It’s cool to be the creator of a cult comic, but it would be better to be the creator of a popular one.

Update A few things I forgot to mention in the first draft. I’ve recently had problems with the way the blog appears in Internet Explorer, which appear to have been more IE’s fault than mine. They’re fixed now, but I do recommend you use Firefox to read Spinneyhead, or subscribe to all the RSS feeds, where the formatting issue won’t be such a problem.

And I really ought to give a shout out to everyone else from the article- Stephen Newton, who wrote it, Lord Rich, Southern Bird, I love air guitar, Call-centre confidential (RIP), Airport Exile, North West Passages, United Rant, Manchester Buccanneers and Bitter and Blue.

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The Sex Toy Chronicles

It’s been a year and a bit since I published the notes toward the design of the perfect sex toy. I haven’t made much progress, but some others have. I think it’s time for a round up, in chronological order, of all the Sex Toy posts since the list was published.

Helping Hands– where we got a mention on Fleshbot and a few suggestions
Perfect Sex Toy project shopping list
Beaten to it!– someone else patents vibrator control over the internet
Search Term Roulette

Sym Toys

Toy– the first design for the Perfect Sex Toy tops
Perfect Ladies
More Perfect
No Batteries Required
“It’s the ultimate in site stickiness”
Can we add some things to that list?
Delayed Perfection
Teledildonics
Do It Yourself

And then there are all the ones that are even more tangentially related, but you can find those yourselves. I’m all worn out.

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The first days of the rest of my (blogging) life

I’m a few days into treating blogging as a full time job. My explanation still hovers somewhere between this being what I really want to do and something I’m doing until a new job comes along. Hopefully I’ll soon be earning enough to stop apologising for my choice.

The Plan

The simple motivator is my transition to New Deal and the government’s desire for me to stop being a statistic. What this means, in practical terms, is training in the basics of cashflow and book keeping then six months of supported trading. during that period I stay on benefits and any money I make goes into a business account, only to be touched for business use. At the end of the six months they give me my cheque book and I’m left to sink or swim.

What’s the business plan? Well it’s a collection of vague and specific aims.

Vaguely-

Increase revenue by raising readership and optimising the various advertising and other money making schemes.

More specifically-

Relaunch Eco House as How to Save the World for Free (a name right on the cusp between catchy and clunky, I admit), get it some media coverage and use it as a stepping stone to, preferably, a TV programme or, at least, a book.

Pimp up Spinneyhead. I see the site continuing as a repository of silly stuff with new material and the occasional bit of home made, and hopefully viral, media like the parrot.

Expand the Spinneyhead family. Not much chance chance of challenging Gawker or WeblogsInc but there are a few specialist areas to cover. Launched recently was Spinneyhead Scale, dedicated to modelmaking and tracking down online resources for modellers. Coming soon- Digest, covering foods, diet and general health stuff and Spinneyworld- local news from around the world.

Sell more stuff. This starts with make more stuff. I’ve fallen behind on the one product per week plan from the start ofc the year, it’s time to catch up. Obviously, every piece of merchandise will say Spinneyhead on it somewhere, all part of spreading the name.

Other stuff, including an increase in comments on other blogs and the use of trackbacks whenever possible. I’ll consider lots of things to raise my profile, within reason, particularly anything that’ll get a mention in the mainstream media. (I am not putting on a Batman outfit and pulling any Fathers4Justice style stunts.)

How to make money, and how much I need to make

I’ve discussed previously how much I’d be willing to live on. Minimum wage is currently �4.85. Assuming a 7 1/2 hour that equates to �36.37 per day, �9457.50 per year for a 5 day week. Is that possible? Of course it is, or there wouldn’t be any pro bloggers for me to take advice from. Can I manage it within 6 months? There’s the question.

So far Google AdSense has proven the best performing of the schemes I’ve signed up to. This month I’m averaging just over $1 a day. Last month was a better $1.60. Nowhere near what I need to be making, but it’s a start, something to build on.

Amazon is the next best payer. I get a few sales every quarter, but not always enough to trigger payout. The shop has generated a small amount of income, and the affiliate schemes haven’t been going long enough to get a good read on them.

The obvious first step toward increased revenue has to be the increase in traffic. Ad revenue and affiliate sales aren’t directly proportional to traffic, but getting the links in front of more eyeballs can’t hurt. In terms of AdSense I need to work on improving the value of each click- the headlines from How to Save the World for Free aren’t just there to cross promote, they’ve also convinced Google to serve me more than just ads for blogging services.

Amazon have recently improved their methods for building links, and I’ve been taking advantage of them. You’ll have noticed the highlighted boxes at the right or left of occasional posts, much more enticing than text links. I’ve also started doing more reviews. I’m being honest in them. I wouldn’t try to sell you Catwoman for instance (though, if you really must, please use the link I just provided), so when I say something is worth buying you can believe me.

I’ve already mentioned the first step to improving merchandise sales- make more of it. On top of that I have to get some of it into shops. Discontinuous Infill is stocked by one shop in Manchester, and I’m trying to get it press attention and more outlets for issue 2. Manchester has seasonal markets and my sister is looking at getting a stall at one of them. If I can go in with her on that I should be able to sell some stuff and generate some interest.

I’m still not sure what to do with the affiliate programmes. Would anyone like a Free Mini Vibrator?

In the long term I see a book. Not a book about blogging, far too many people have done those, possibly a tale of the successes and failures in my 100 Things quest and definitely something tied into How to Save the World for Free. If webcomicsnation ever gets off the ground I’d still like to do a webcomic and I’ve been mulling over a few part formed ideas for novels. But most likely this will take me in a direction I don’t expect.

So there you are. The state of the Spinneyhead nation as of Tuesday this week. Team Spinneyhead members- when I start turning a healthy profit you shall be paid an amount commensurate with your posting volume. Possibly in beer or chutney.

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