Probe in Levenshulme launched following huge blaze at house triggered by cannabis farm equipment – Manchester Evening News

In other news, not a single Mars bar can be found between Longsight and Stockport.

An investigation is underway after a massive house blaze was triggered by a suspected cannabis farm in Levenshulme.

Fire and police were called to the semi-detached house on Grange Avenue at around 7.45pm yesterday as the fire spread through the first and second floors of the property.

Probe in Levenshulme launched following huge blaze at house triggered by cannabis farm equipment – Manchester Evening News.

The placebo effect is destroying the pharmaceutical industry

As drug companies strive to treat ever less well defined problems they’re finding that sugar pills are often as effective as their wonder drugs. Scientists are investigating the placebo effectand learning more about how state of mind affects health. Obviously you can’t just give someone an inert tablet and hope you can convince them to get better- that’s called homeopathy- but it seems that improved communication and a good bedside manner can make a pescription more effective.

Got any Salmon?

A great philosopher once wrote
Naughty, naughty, very naughty
Ha ha ha ha ha

There’s a guy in the place
He’s got a bittersweet face
And he goes by the name of Ebeneezer Goode
His friends call him Eezer and he is the main geezer
And he’ll vibe about the place like no other man could
He’s refined, he’s sublime, he makes you feel fine
Though very much maligned and misunderstood
But if you know Eezer he’s a real crowd pleaser
He’s ever so good, he’s Ebeneezer Goode
You can see that he’s mischievious, mysterious and devious
When he circulates amongst the people in the place
But once you know he’s fun and something of a genius
He gives a grin that goes around from face to face to face
Backwards and then forwards, forwards and then backwards
Eezer is the geezer who loves to muscle in
That’s about the time the crowd all shout the name of Eezer
As he’s kotcheled in the corner, laughing by the bass bin

E’s are Good, E’s are Good
He’s Ebeneezer Goode
E’s are Good, E’s are Good
He’s Ebeneezer Goode
E’s are Good, E’s are Good
He’s Ebeneezer Goode
E’s are Good, E’s are Good
He’s Ebeneezer Goode
He’s Ebeneezer Goode

Has anybody got any veras
Ha ha ha ha ha
Ha ha ha ha ha

A great philosopher once wrote
Naughty, naughty, very naughty
Ha ha ha ha ha

Ebeneezer Goode, leading light of the scene
Know what I mean, see
He created the vibe
He takes you for a ride and as if by design
The party ignites like he’s comin alive
He takes you to the top, shakes you all around
Then back down, you know as he gets mellow
Then as smooth as the groove that is making you move
He glides into your mind with a sunny Hello
A gentleman of leisure, he’s there for your pleasure
But go easy on old Eezer he’s the love you could lose
Extraordinary fellow, like Mr. Punchinello
He’s the kind of geezer who must never be abused
When you’re in town and Ebeneezer is around
You can sense a presence in the sound of the crowd
He gets them all at it, the party starts rocking
The people get excited it’s time to shout loud

E’s are Good, E’s are Good
He’s Ebeneezer Goode
E’s are Good, E’s are Good
He’s Ebeneezer Goode
E’s are Good, E’s are Good
He’s Ebeneezer Goode
E’s are Good, E’s are Good
He’s Ebeneezer Goode

He’s Ebeneezer Goode
He’s Ebeneezer Goode
E’s are Good, E’s are Good
E’s are Good, E’s are Good
He’s Ebeneezer Goode

Got any salmon Sorted
Ha ha ha ha ha
Ha ha ha ha ha
Eezer Goode, Eezer Goode
Eezer Goode, Eezer Goode
Oh what a carry on, ha ha ha ha ha
Eezer Goode, Eezer Goode
Eezer Goode, Eezer Goode
He’s Ebeneezer Goode

He’s Ebeneezer Goode
Oh what a carry on, ha ha ha ha ha
He’s Ebeneezer Goode
E’s are Good, E’s are Good
E’s are Good, E’s are Good
He’s Ebeneezer Goode
He’s Ebeneezer Goode
He’s Ebeneezer Goode
E’s are Good, E’s are Good

Ebeneezer Goode – The Shamen

For their sake, download

For their sake, download, originally uploaded by spinneyhead.

With the news that Amy Winehouse’s father in law is urging fans to stop buying her records until she stops taking drugs, I thought I should go back to an idea I had a while ago. It’s in response to all those “Piracy funds terror/drugs” ads you see.

Record sales fund their drug habits. For their sake, download.

Fast boats and sleepy villages

£350,000 would buy you a speedboat capable of going 70 miles per hour and carrying up to six tons of drugs which was virtually undetectable.  Just what every fisherman needs.


A whole Spanish village is suspected in the murder of its unpopular mayor.  Fago is the second smallest village in its region and its mayor of 12 years was in fear of his life and contemplating standing down when he was shot multiple times on his way back from a meeting in another town.  This sounds like the plot to the sort of film Gerard Depardieu would appear in.


How Green is your supermarket?  Following Tescos and Marks & Spencers’ announcements, the Telegraph tests the big four to see how they’re doing at present.

Flash based family tree thingy.  Mum’s doing the family tree at the moment, but I think she’s a long way past this level of complexity.

Dissolving dresses as a metaphor for throwaway culture.

Either up your nose or through your veins, with nothing to gain except killing your brain

I was just pondering the whole “Piracy funds terrorism/drug dealing” line. I bet, backed up by a little research, it would be easy to find a list of entertainment executives who donated to NORAID (I started doing this, but the first site offering a list of donors was stormfront, a self confessed white supremacist site. My days of surfing hate sites from work are long gone.) And it’s well documented how many musicians do drugs.

So how about a Tshirt with a picture of Pete Doherty on the front and a slogan along the lines of “Record sales fund this man’s drug habit. For his sake- download.”

(White Lines, Grandmaster Flash)

So Much To Answer For- Part 17

They were waiting at Joe’s house. The Big Bastard and the man with tattoos- his head shaved to show off the scales that wrapped around the skull. “Oh fuck.” Joe muttered.

“Who are they?” Rachel asked as she rounded the car.

“Probably the people who torched my studio.”

“I’ll call the Police.”

The tattooed man’s jacket flapped open. There was a gun tucked into the waistband of his trousers. Joe stopped Rachel’s hand as she went for her phone. “Not just yet.”

They stood their ground by the Smart car. After a moment’s hesitation Big Bastard and Tattoos walked over.

“You have our money.” Tattoos, with a heavy accent, possibly Eastern European.

“I what?”

“You have our money.” Tattoos.

“One million Euros.” Big Bastard.

“Exactly.” Tattoos.


“You are holding for Hill.” Tattoos.

“He says you are tight.” Bastard.

“He asked. I refused. I’m holding nothing for Hill.” Tattoos and big bastard exchanged glances. “Hill is dead. But you know that, don’t you?” Their expressions said they didn’t.

“You have our money.” Bastard.

“The outhouse was a warning.” Tattoos.

Joe enunciated his answer slowly, as he was just thinking it through himself. “You think I have a million of your Euros. So you burnt down one of the places I might keep it?”

Tattoos and Big Bastard exchanged one of those looks. If they had been that stupid they were going to suffer. “You were not holding for Hill?” Tattoos asked eventually.

“No. I’d bet whoever killed him has the money.”

They thought about this for a while, conversed in a language Joe couldn’t hope to place. He thought of sliding his mobile out and dialling 999 whilst they were preoccupied, but they kept casting glances his way. After a minute or so they seemed to have reached an agreement. “Makes sense, what you say. You know who killed Hill?”

“Of course I don’t.”

“We think it was customers. The goods arrive today. If they get money and drugs they win both ways.” Tattoos.

“You should go and see them then.” Joe was beginning to hope he’d talked his way out of a dangerous situation.

“Yes. You come with us. Not good for you to be phoning Police tell them about us.” Big Bastard.

“We are honourable. We let you go when we know the truth.” Tattoos.

“How do we know that?”

“I suppose you do not. But we are the ones with the guns. You come with us because we say so.” Tattoos answered.

Part 18
Part 16
Part 1

NaNoWriMo Progress

Other fiction- check out Heavensent, the propeller-punk sci-fi war novel I recently wrapped up, or download Another Education/Ruby Red or Ten Years Asleep.

Donate Now I’ve started writing again I’m unlikely to stop, but it would be nice if I could eat during my breaks. So please feel free to donate some money to my starving author fund by clicking on the PayPal button below.

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Heaven knows I'm (less) miserable now

I never thought I’d be reading, or recommending, a self help book.

A couple of months ago, whilst reading around the subject, I realised that I’ve been having bouts of depression since my teens. Failure to recognise this sooner had left me without developed coping mechanisms and no doubt held me back on occasion. It was only because I was in the worst spell I could remember that I ended up doing anything about it.

My GP recommended Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, but admitted that it would be at least six months before I could expect to see someone on a one to one basis. He gave me a couple of web addresses to check out in the mean time.

Most informative of the sites was Mood Gym. It was whilst reading this site that I began to recognise my history of depression. The site is meant to introduce Cognitive Behavioural Therapy and seems biased toward university students (it is running on an edu.au domain). There are also a few exercises to help you to help yourself.

Mood Gym isn’t perfect. The exercises didn’t always save properly and its insistence on referring to “Warpy thoughts” grated. However it did Cognitive Behavioural Therapy and drove me to look for a more in depth resource.

I decided to move on to bibliotherapy. The third result on Amazon for “Cognitive Therapy”, after Cognitive Behavioural Therapy for Dummies and Mind Over Mood: Cognitive Treatment Therapy Manual for Clients was Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy. Despite having fewer stars, the reader reviews were, for me, more convincing. I’ve been working my way through it for the last few weeks.

The theory behind Cognitive Behavioural Therapy is quite obvious. Before chemical imbalances or external influences, it is what you think that affects how you feel. Negative thoughts make youfeel bad, bad mood leads to more negative thoughts, and so it continues.. The trick is to recognise what the author calls Automatic Thinking (“warpy thoughts” if you’re an Australian undergraduate) and counter it. There are other factors, for example depression makes you feel that you can’t do anything, so you don’t, thus reinforcing your feelings of uselessness. Unsurprisingly, the answer to this is to do something, because you’ll be surprised how good it feels to get even the simplest job done.

This all sounds like the sort of advice friends and family try to give you- “Pull your socks up”, “Snap out of it” etc. The problem is that, no matter how well meaning, the drive can’t come from outside because you’ll just react against it.

There’s more. Advice on dealing with criticism and guilt and controlling your anger and other things that can bring you down. There’s also a large reference section on all the drugs you might be prescribed, how they act and what side effects may occur so you’ll be better informed if your doctor prescribes them.

Is it working for me? I think so. I’m still not the happiest person you’ll meet, but I am learning to cope and to cut off the negative thoughts before they put me in a funk. I’m also forcing myself to do stuff, no matter what. It may not be focussed exactly where it should be, but it all helps. Soon enough I hope to be back to full working order, growing Spinneyhead’s tail and looking to the future.

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Songs to get buried to

Following on from Monday’s post about the top ten funeral songs, I thought it would be worth drawing up a list of alternative funeral songs. Leave your own suggestions in the comments and I’ll add them to the list.

I Can’t Imagine The World Without Me – Echobelly
The already mentioned brisk two fingers to death and a call to enjoy life.

Life is Grand – Camper Van Beethoven
After an album of songs about death and drugs the Beethovens turn around and say, “The hell with you miserable bastards, we quite enjoy life.”

The Only Living Boy in New Cross – Carter USM
You can never be sure with Carter, they hide some dark subjects under their pop-punk. This song seems to be about the pressures of touring and I adopted it as the theme tune to a hellish period on the road in 2001. In keeping with the memorial theme it does have a dedication-

Goodbye Rudy, David and Rosie
Abraham and Julianne
and everyone that knows me

The gypsies, the travellers and the thieves
The good, the bad, the average and unique
The grebos the crusties and you and I

Wonderstuff – Give, Give, Give, Me More, More, More

Well I hope I make more money than this in the next world.
I hope there’s a lot more in it there for me.
I’d like my trousers pressed and my shoes
shined up by a rich girl,
who’s only care in the world is me.

What a Wonderful World – Louis Armstrong or Joey Ramone
Because it is a wonderful world, and perhaps people need reminding.

Previous musical lists-
Music to get laid to


Always Look on the Bright Side of Life – Monty Python
So obvious I’m surprised more people don’t choose it. Best if you can be sure a choir of friends and family will get up to perform it.

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I’ve been getting a lot of spam about Hoodia recently. It seems to be displacing some of the other wonder drugs, though I still get lots of Viagra spam (or ./iagra or other variations to get past filters). So what is Hoodia?

Wikipedia’s entry on the plant. It seems it can be used as an appetite suppressant.

I think there are two trends in spam- fear and greed. Greed is obvious, we all want money for nothing. Fear is mainly about our insecurities about being fat, floppy or bald. The Hoodia pitchers are trading on the fear of fat.

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Thrills, Pills and Spills

If you’ve missed the TV adverts recently, you may be unware that Bez has picked his favorite songs from the Madchester era and released them as a double album. The music itself is a great selection and the only thing stopping me from buying it is that I have most of the tracks already on other albums or compilations.

What’s currently amusing me though is the sheer number of tracks on the album which in one form or another are about drugs or are heavily associated with the drugs scene!

The Semen Book

I’ve started using Amazon’s beta Self Optimising Links to bring up relevant products in the banner and sidebar. So far so good. The post about Slayer Day brings up a list of Slayer albums and yesterday’s post about semen making you happy has some very interesting results. Including the simply titled The Semen Book.

Book Description
Did you know that human sperm is ejaculated at a speed of 17 km/h.? Or that ejaculate is pushed out in 0,8 second intervals? Or that the male orgasm, which usually lasts between 3 and 10 seconds, only in exceptional cases lasts longer than 15 seconds? Or that it is accompanied by an increase in heart frequency to 180 beats per minute, and that breathing can accelerate to 40 breaths per minute? Just about any question about semen, fertility, male sexual potency, and sexual physiology, is answered by Vivien Marx in this lively, informed and entertainingly written book. It is a book for men. It is a book for women. It is a reference book, a textbook, and a good read. If you ever wondered what the purpose of orgasm is, what determines the smell and colour of semen, wondered about delayed ejaculations – retrograde ejaculations, how best to look after testicles, how smoking, alcohol, drugs, stress and lifestyle affect potency and fertility, how environmental influences fertility, (are British men an endangered species?), about semen and disease – the unloved companions of the sperm cells, semen and criminology, the history of semen science, how semen is tested – you will find the answers to these and hundreds of other questions here. Of potential interest to everyone who walks into a bookshop. Meticulously researched and written in an entertaining and informative style. Sure to attract media attention. Timely book for the sexual health market.

I wonder what the Perfect Sex Toy post will bring up?

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